User contributions for BlackAion

6 February 2021

• 01:1401:14, 6 February 2021 diff hist +6‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-4Ex ‎ →‎Main story 2-4Ex 『Steel Line soldiers' handbook』

5 February 2021

• 21:1921:19, 5 February 2021 diff hist +38‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-8 ‎ →‎The Bioroids go to the battlefield one more time to look for Indomitable Marie.
• 21:0021:00, 5 February 2021 diff hist 0‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-7B ‎ →‎Fortune asks you to bring her the remaining of the Iron Parasites that got eaten by Predator.
• 20:5720:57, 5 February 2021 diff hist +11‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-7 ‎ →‎The Bioroids are planning to help their friends in danger.
• 16:3216:32, 5 February 2021 diff hist +19‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-6 ‎ It seems to imply that the Iron parasites didn't know what the bioroids were doing. The sentence doesn't make sense in English if that isn't the case;
• 16:1216:12, 5 February 2021 diff hist +37‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-5 ‎ →‎The Bioroids are following Captain Marie's trace.
• 15:4715:47, 5 February 2021 diff hist +3‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-5 ‎ Mostly minor issues; The context of the sentence implies that the monster may still be around even though Marie's troops were ambushed some time ago.
• 14:4514:45, 5 February 2021 diff hist +2‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-1 ‎ →‎Bioroids are moving again to produce new friends.
• 05:4605:46, 5 February 2021 diff hist −3‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-1 ‎ →‎Bioroids are moving again to produce new friends.
• 05:1705:17, 5 February 2021 diff hist −14‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-4 ‎ →‎After hearing the recording, Bioroids start to look for Indomitable Marie.
• 02:5702:57, 5 February 2021 diff hist +1‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-4B ‎ →‎Griffon took away all tuna cans from LRL, and she wants you to find other tuna cans...
• 01:4701:47, 5 February 2021 diff hist +8‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-3 ‎ →‎The last human sends Bioroids out to look for nutrition sources to prepare for the war.
• 01:2501:25, 5 February 2021 diff hist +8‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-2 ‎ →‎The last human and the Bioroids are looking for power sources to prepare for the war.

4 February 2021

• 22:5122:51, 4 February 2021 diff hist −3‎ Dialogue/Main Story 2-1 ‎ Minor issues mostly; You only put "n" after "a" if "a" is followed "a", "e", "i", "o", or "u"; Don't need the rest of that sentence
• 20:5620:56, 4 February 2021 diff hist +7‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-8 ‎ →‎The Bioroids set out to find the trapped enemy.
• 19:5119:51, 4 February 2021 diff hist +10‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-6B ‎ Minor Issues; Last line is an incomplete sentence.
• 19:3719:37, 4 February 2021 diff hist −1‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-6 ‎ →‎Bioroids are trying to move out to face the Iron Parasites that are narrowing the siege.
• 19:3619:36, 4 February 2021 diff hist −4‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-6 ‎ →‎Bioroids are trying to move out to face the Iron Parasites that are narrowing the siege.
• 19:3319:33, 4 February 2021 diff hist +1‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-7 ‎ Minor Issues. Also Brave motherfucker.
• 19:2619:26, 4 February 2021 diff hist +20‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-6 ‎ Mostly minor issues; I replaced moron with coward. She may have said Baka in translation but coward fits better with the context; Humans is plural, not humen. Humen is not a word.
• 19:0919:09, 4 February 2021 diff hist +7‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-3Ex ‎ →‎Fortune wants you to collect samples to help her research the infection process of Iron Parasites.
• 19:0619:06, 4 February 2021 diff hist −1‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-5B ‎ →‎Johanna suggests you to recycle parts from the broken robots to use as resources.
• 18:4618:46, 4 February 2021 diff hist +38‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-5 ‎ →‎To rescue the robots in danger, the Bioroids are working hard.
• 14:4714:47, 4 February 2021 diff hist +6‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-2Ex ‎ Mostly minor issues; using "by myself" and "all alone" right after the other is redundant
• 14:3514:35, 4 February 2021 diff hist +14‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-1Ex ‎ →‎LRL is asking you a favor to find her lost things.

3 February 2021

• 02:3102:31, 3 February 2021 diff hist +3‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-4 ‎ Minor Issues.

2 February 2021

• 22:3422:34, 2 February 2021 diff hist +3‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-4 ‎ →‎The Bioroids who received the distress signals are moving out to help their sisters in need.
• 22:1722:17, 2 February 2021 diff hist +2‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-4B ‎ Only one singular minor issue.
• 02:4702:47, 2 February 2021 diff hist +2‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-3B ‎ 99% of this completely fine.
• 02:1802:18, 2 February 2021 diff hist +18‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-3 ‎ Mostly minor issues; I'm assuming you were trying to spell mortal and not moral which are two different things; Equipment is plural and singular so "s" is not necessary;

1 February 2021

• 22:4922:49, 1 February 2021 diff hist −11‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-2 ‎ Mostly minor issues. Most of it is okay; Breakthrough and Break through might be the same set of words but they have different meanings when combined or separated. Scariest isn't a word. We may use it but isn't a word. Yeah I know it's stupid.; Based on the context of their discussion, it seems the the group is heading to the Lighthouse but are taking different paths to it so the parasites don't swarm the lighthouse.

31 January 2021

• 00:4300:43, 31 January 2021 diff hist −73‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-1 ‎ Saying instead of said feels better. The ? after Griffon doesnt seem right. She seems to be making a statement not questioning Griffon. The "then" is unnecessary. Run-on sentence, and you misspelled reaches. The part where she talks about taking over humanity, can be better worded as so.
• 00:0700:07, 31 January 2021 diff hist +4‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-1 ‎ Reworded this so it sounds better.
• 00:0000:00, 31 January 2021 diff hist −1‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-1 ‎ →‎When the Bioroids finally found the human, they are trying to break through the siege of Iron Parasites and escape.

30 January 2021

• 23:4223:42, 30 January 2021 diff hist +4‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-1 ‎ "There're" is technically grammatically correct but no natural english speaker ever uses "there" and "are" combined like that, not even in slang.
• 23:3023:30, 30 January 2021 diff hist +3‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-1 ‎ This is one is not your fault. English as a language is at fault here. I don't expect anyone except a natural english speaker to know what was wrong with that sentence.
• 22:5322:53, 30 January 2021 diff hist 0‎ Dialogue/Main Story 1-1 ‎ You edited what I put but you forgot a few things in that first sentence. You also forgot to remove the "for sure" at the end of the next line. Double space between "have" and "any". I better worded Constantia's destroy order line. Constantia's next line seems like she is disagreeing with Griffon so changed certain words to better match that context.